St Mary’s Parish Magazine – December 2002

More light for St Mary’s

From the registers

Baptisms

Funerals

Preparing for Lent

The Benedictine way

St Mary’s Guild

WHAT’S ON THIS MONTH? - December

Saints in December

Readings for Sundays & Festivals in January

Daily prayer topics in December

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The Social Committee is busy preparing for the Christmas Fair on December 7 but it needs some more help. See page 7.

Christian Aid can receive £3.50 for every discarded mobile phone. There is a box under the large table under the tower for this collection.

On Advent Sunday, December 1, the Preacher at 9.30am will be Revd Dr Jeffrey John, Canon Theologian of Southwark Cathedral and Bishop’s Adviser for Ministry. Evensong that day will be as usual - with the Advent Carol Service the following Sunday, when it will be attended by Churches Together.

Organ buffs might like to know that the new organ at St Peter’s, Woodmansterne, is to be dedicated on Saturday December 7, when the visiting organist will be Simon Preston, lately of Liverpool cathedral.

Please note that the Ringers Quiz will take place on Saturday, February 15, and not the 8th as advertised elsewhere.

Once again Churches Together in Beddington & Wallington are hosting a Christmas Day Lunch. It takes place at St Patrick’s Hall, and is open to anyone who would like to attend as long as they have booked first! Each church is asked to provide a trifle, 12 mince pies and bottle of sherry and a raffle prize. Volunteers will also be needed to help on Christmas Eve with preparing vegetables and decorating the hall, and on the day to act as drivers, waiters and a “host” for each table. If you can help in any way speak to Pam Vernon (8669 1549)

Editor quits shock

Sorry about the tabloid headline but I just thought it too good an opportunity to miss. Yes, after something over 11 years doing a job I took on for only three months when David Richardson left, I really feel it’s time to hang up my eyeshade. It will be a wrench, for I’ve enjoyed filling the pages and tender my heartfelt thanks to all those contributors who helped me out over the years. The January issue will be the last for which I accept responsibility.

So who is going to be my successor? This is the difficult bit. As the Magazine Panel has no one in mind it has decided to open up the field to all-comers, rather than sidle up to some unsuspecting person and whispering in their ear. If you are interested in taking on this worthwhile and responsible post, please have a word with me or Selwyn.

And what’s involved? The magazine starts to take shape early in the month before publication when the panel meets to sort out the diary page and review any articles that may already have been submitted (the real copy deadline is much later in the month). It tries to think of articles that my be suitable and may commission contributors. After that the Editor is on his or her own. You don’t have to worry about finding advertisements as Bob Pedrick, our advertising manager, does a grand job at that.

The successful applicant will need to have a PC, or ready access to one, have a firm command of the English language (not all our contributors are literary giants) and have endless patience - though you are allowed to scream and rant in private. Incidentally I use Microsoft Publisher to produce the magazine but I guess any DTP package would do.

So if you feel you would like to have a go please have I word with me - and I’m quite prepared to hold your hand for a few months.

Stewart Kimber

Christmas services

Services this Christmas will follow their usual pattern. The Christingle and Toy Service will take place at 4.00pm on Sunday December 15. Please bring a toy, wrapped and labelled with the age and sex of the child it would be suitable for. The toys will be collected during the service and passed to a local organisation which will make sure they go to children who otherwise would not receive any presents this Christmas.

The service of nine lessons and carols will be at 6.30pm on Sunday December 22. This is the traditional preparation for Christmas, with Bible readings, carols old and new sung by the choir and congregational hymns.

On Christmas Eve, first of all comes a service for families (particularly small children) at 6.00pm. This includes Building the Crib and is organised by members of the Sunday School. Then at 11.30pm comes the traditional Midnight Mass of Christmas.

On Christmas Day at 9.00am (note the time) there is a Eucharist with carols - there is no 8.00am Eucharist.

Evening Prayer on Sunday the 29th will be said while the choir has its well-earned Christmas break; it will be back to celebrate the Epiphany on Sunday January 5.

More light for St Mary’s

The Parochial Church Council met on Friday, November 15, when the main item of business was the urgent consideration of proposals for re-wiring the church and installation of a new lighting system. We have been required to undertake this within the next 12 months, as a result of the survey and report made recently by Complete Electrical Services. Graham Smith of CES joined the meeting and talked us through, and demonstrated certain aspects of, his plans. We were impressed by what we saw and heard, and had no hesitation in approving the plans.

As ever, there are cost implications. The Finance Committee had been doing its homework and came up with an affordable budget of about £26,000. Two years’ worth of tax rebate, amounting to some £12,000, is expected early in the new year. (If ever proof were needed of the benefits of Gift Aid, this surely is it). This should cover the first phase of the scheme – the urgent “remedial” work to the wiring – and get funds well under way for the major work later. In addition, the Diocese has agreed to put the 2003, interest-free, mortgage repayment on hold for one year which means that some £13,000 – hopefully largely from next year’s Shopping List - can be freed-up to cover the rest of the electrical work, and the mortgage still paid off by the end of 2004, several years earlier than originally anticipated.

The electrical inspection had also indicated that the floodlighting in the churchyard was unsafe as well as sometimes unreliable. Sadly the budget could not be stretched to include the cost of replacing the floodlights yet, but it is hoped that the applications about to be made to charitable trusts for grant aid might result in sufficient income to fund a new system during the year.

In the meantime, it was impressed on us that it will be necessary, once remedial work is begun, for the floodlighting to be made safe and turned off. Once the work has started in the new year, however, it should be possible to provide a new light over each of the West and South doors which will in some part compensate for the lack of floodlighting.

We were assured that the wiring in the Centre is perfectly safe, and that any electrical work in the tower can be left until we are ready to begin the Tower & Bells project. It also means that the choir can stay warm in their vestry by continuing to use their fan heaters in safety.

The PCC is hopeful that, with CES’s long experience of ecclesiastical contracts in historical buildings, and their knowledge of what is and isn’t acceptable to the DAC, the legal complexities of faculty approval will run smoothly, and that work can commence early in the new year. We are also encouraged by the support of Archdeacon Tony Davies.

Consideration of matters electrical did not take up the entire meeting (quite). We noted, with pleasure, that the votive stand was now in place, and in use, and heard of plans to supply a small matching stand to store candles, together with a snuffer.

It seems that there was some misunderstanding over the PCC’s appointment of a Health and Safety Officer, and June Allen has requested that this matter be clarified. June has agreed to oversee First Aid but NOT to undertake any responsibility as a Health and Safety Officer. The PCC reiterated its gratitude to June for all that she has done, and continues to do, in this respect.

The missing lychgates not having miraculously reappeared, the PCC were informed that these could be replaced, without further consultation, under the terms of our insurance policy. However, since the likelihood of the gates being stolen again is pretty high, and as we are not legally obliged to replace them (unless we intend keeping sheep in the churchyard), the PCC decided against replacing them.

Having been without a Stewardship Recorder since Anne May’s resignation, the PCC was grateful to learn that Pierre Delahunty had agreed to take on this role. We were also given notice of an Episcopal Visitation, probably sometime late next year, when the newly appointed Bishop of Croydon will spend a whole day in the parish.

Our next meeting takes place on Monday, January 20 when, among other matters, the Budget for 2003 will be set.

Diana Harries, Secretary to the PCC

From the registers

Baptisms

Nov 10 Henry James Thom-Cole, 232 Wrythe Lane

Ryan William James Davenport, 228 Demesne Road

Funerals

Oct 14 George Alan Bullen, aged 73, of 25 Queenswood Avenue

16 Trevor Laurence Mountney, aged 60, of 15 Ferrers Avenue

22 Grace Edith Tissington, aged 99, of 6 Homemead Road

28 Alan George Hills, aged 74, of 16 Lytton Avenue

Nov 6 Barbara Joan Jefferies, aged 60, of 139 Demesne Road

Preparing for Lent

As Christmas comes can Lent be far behind! Churches Together in Beddington and Wallington are once again organising a programme of speakers for Wednesday evenings of Lent next year. The talks will take place at St Elphege’s at 8.00pm. The following speakers have agreed to come.

March 12	Spirituality in the workplace by Jill Garett, former managing director of Gallup and a former head teacher
March 19	Spirituality and the local community by Steve Chalke of “Fireworks” which is a large group of Christian organisations
March 26	Spirituality and Mission in a plural society by Canon Philip King, one time General Secretary of the C of E General Synod Board for Mission
April 2	Spirituality and Science by Dr Denis Alexander, research scientist and broadcaster
April 9	Spirituality and suffering by Dr Marie Joseph of St Raphael’s Hospice.

The Benedictine way

Last May I went along to an Oblate Enquirers weekend at St Mary’s Abbey in Kent. Having spent 5½ years there with community both as a Novice and Junior Sister in temporary vows, and having spent two years now adjusting to secular life once again, I felt I would like to continue my association with the Abbey as an Oblate.

The Benedictine Way has so much to teach us about how to live in relationship with our God and one another. Having spent the past six months making a conscious effort to balance my life between prayer, work, worship and study, in fact continuing with all that I had learnt in the Abbey, I returned to West Malling on November 1 and was admitted with seven others, as a Novice Oblate of Malling Abbey.

The Abbess received us and each was assigned their own Oblate Sister. During the ceremony we each received a gold brooch on which is engraved the Latin word “PAX” surrounded by a crown of thorns. Pax means peace and we are to seek peace and pursue it (according to the Rule of St Benedict, no matter how difficult the circumstances may be - hence the crown of thorns.)

Oblates are men and women who feel called by God to follow the Benedictine way, but outside the cloister. They affirm their baptismal commitment by a promise of conversion of life worked out in a personal rule based on the Rule of St Benedict. As members of the oblate family they are united to the Community at St Mary’s Abbey, and to their fellow oblates in mutual love and fellowship.

The life of a Benedictine Oblate is therefore a response of love, a life-long commitment to Christ who invites each one to “learn of me”. This commitment gives the oblate the discipline, stability and freedom to grow into the likeness of Christ, and to persevere in generous and loving service to God’s world. Oblation is an offering of the whole of one’s life to God. To be an oblate is therefore a serious decision which needs to be mutually explored by the aspirant and the Community. This is done during a period of discernment and training first as a postulant for six months, then as a novice for at least two years.

One might wonder why I should need to go through further training, having lived the life for 5½ years in enclosure - it is because the context is entirely different. In the monastery ones daily routine is already fixed and each lives under strict obedience to the Abbess and the Rule of St Benedict as lived out in that community. Whereas in secular life it is more a matter of self-discipline and each Oblate needs to discover the pattern for their own life in the circumstances in which they find themselves.

As I continue this journey of discovery, I would like to share with you from time to time some Benedictine insights on work, prayer, stability, silence, obedience, conversion of life, etc. There is so much we can learn from the Benedictine monastic communities, to whom we owe a great deal that still shapes our Anglican worship today, and in fact, our western civilisation.

Jenifer Davison

St Mary’s Guild

The Guild recently enjoyed an interesting talk on the Samaritans, given by Mrs Dorothy Bradford. She reminded us of the beginning of the work, when in 1953, Chad Varah became Rector of the damaged church of St Stephen, Walbrook.

As a city church, its parish contained many workers but few residents, so the congregation was small. Chad Varah took two funerals, one of a teenager and one of a young woman, whose suicides might have been prevented had they known someone to whom they could have talked about their fears and worries. He decided to offer an ear.

Having no vestry, just a hut in the grounds, he called BT to ask for an easily re-called number. They said, “What is your number?” When he dusted off the dial, he read, “Mansion House 9000.”

Because he had worked in Fleet Street, he was able to arrange publicity and within a week he was taking calls 12 hours a day. So he engaged a secretary. Within a month, they were both working a 12-hour day and people were coming in to see him in person. Volunteers were asked to make tea and then he realised that they were doing the listening too, often well enough for callers to depart before he was free!

In the last 50 years, the movement has spread to many countries but we were most interested to hear about the Croydon and Sutton Branch. It started in a house, due to be demolished, with mice, defective floorboards and leaking roof. When they had the chance to buy the present Centre, the money was found within 48 hours from interest-free loans from the members to cover the loan from Headquarters. The Centre costs £1,000 a month for necessary bills but receives no grant from Headquarters or the Local Authority. The members raise the funds.

We asked how many volunteers provided the 24-hour service. They need 120 but have 80 at present. The 3pm to 7pm slot is the most difficult to staff. Volunteers are carefully selected and trained - all by the Branch. There are always two on together and each volunteer has a personal mentor. Some calls can be so distressing that the volunteer has to talk to someone before going home.

The difficulty is not to get involved and to accept that the outcome might never be known. The listener may be told that the caller has already taken an overdose but can only summon help if the caller agrees. Sometimes help is summoned when unnecessary, which does not please the ambulance service. Some callers phone several times, giving different names. Some have practical problems, which the Samaritans are not there to solve, so one skill to be learned is - how to get that caller off the line to leave it free for the suicidal, etc.

Dorothy thought the causes of despair were many. Perhaps the biggest was loneliness - not always physical, as the caller may have a family or friends but still feel alone. The strength of the Samaritans is that they are, and will remain, anonymous, so the caller feels free to “open up”, knowing that confidentiality is 100%.

Dorothy answered questions from nearly everyone in the audience. Hopefully the Branch has gained some supporters, if we can discover when their fund-raising events occur.

Margaret Freeman

WHAT’S ON THIS MONTH? - December

Sun	1	ADVENT SUNDAY
Mon	2	Bible Study group meets, 23 Mortlake Close	8.00pm
Tue	3	Parents and Toddlers meet in church	10.00am
Wed	4	St Mary’s Guild AGM and Christmas Party St Mary’s Court	2.30pm
Thu	5	MU&OG AGM, Church Centre	8.00pm
Fri	6	Magazine panel meets, 2 Peaks Hill	10.00am
Sat	7	Christmas Fair in church and Centre	11.00am-3.00pm
Sun	8	ADVENT 2
		Advent Carol Service	6.30pm
Mon	9	Bible Study group meets, 23 Mortlake Close	8.00pm
Tue	10	Deanery Synod meets, St Patrick’s	7.45pm
Wed	11	Carew Manor school carol service rehearsal	10.30pm
Thu	12	Carew Manor school carol service, church	11.00am
Sat	14	Families Group Christmas Party, Church Centre	10.00am
Sun	15	ADVENT 3
		Christingle service	4.00pm
Wed	18	MU corporate Eucharist	10.00am
Thu	19	MU&OG carol evening. Church Centre	8.00pm
Sun	22	ADVENT 4
		Service of carols and lessons	6.30pm
Tue	24	CHRISTMAS EVE
		A service for families	6.00pm
		Midnight mass	11.30pm
Wed	25	CHRISTMAS DAY
		Eucharist with carols	9.00am
Fri	27	Prayer Group meets, Carew Chapel	7.30pm
Sat	28	Holy Innocents Eucharist	9.00am
Sun	29	FIRST AFTER CHRISTMAS

Sun Jan 26